My date w/ Shel was such a treat! We went to Chili’s and pigged-out on their bottomless nacho basket, then went to Charlie Goodnight’s to see the Fear Factor host, Joe Rogan. I laughed so hard that my face hurt!! I had no idea that he’s so funny. Shel’s jaw hurt, so it was a good time for him too! Then we went to Krispy Kreme, which is actually kind of a special place for Shel and I because hile at a Krispy Kreme – my very first visit – we decided that we were ‘officially’ together although we had already been dating for two months.

Today is Kristen’s birthday – yay! I hope her birthday present arrives in the mail. I went to bed last night w/ my phone in my hand because I thought that I’d call her at Midnight, but alas, I crapped out and fell asleep. I woke up at 7:45, looked over, saw my cell phone and was like, “Dammit!”

I have nothing more to say…

I’ve got songs on my computer that I hate. But they’re songs that my brothers like, so I leave them on it. Sad, huh? I miss them. Every single day, I miss them.

I went shopping for Mother’s Day today. Last year I was lucky enough to spend it w/ my mom, but I’m not so lucky this year. I haven’t seen my parents in almost six months. My parents and I talk so frequently that when we see each other, we don’t skip a beat. It’s like I was just at their house last week. If I were to – by the grace of God – find a job, the first thing I would do is drive to Pittsburgh for a few days and recharge my batteries. The city, the people, the atmosphere bring me back to center.

Shel and I are going on a date for the first time in forever. Dinner then to a comedy club. I’m looking forward to it. :)

I woke up, snuggled deeper into my pillow and blanket, and decided that maybe I ought to wake up. I figured I could enjoy some time to myself before Shel woke up and before the errands of the day needed to start. I rolled over, looked at my alarm clock, and thought, “holy crap!!” — instead of it being around 8:00-8:30 like I had anticipated, I found it to be nearly 10:00. Weird.

I had strange dreams last night, but I can only remember one of them. Kate and I make dinner for each other every week – sometimes we invite Shel and Allan, and occasionally we don’t. Well, anyway, last night in my dream it was Kate’s turn to make dinner, Shel and Allan were invited, but the catch was, in order to get dinner, we had to climb like a 800ft cliff and it was completely vertical. I declined on dinner, ran to Quiznos, got a sub and watched the three of them climb up the cliff. It took them two entire days to climb, and I was thinking that they were idiots.

This past week has been so hard on a variety of levels. My stress is absolutely through the roof and I’m honestly pretty depressed, too. I’m not very religious at all, but my mom once told me that God never gives you more than you can handle, and that’s kind of become my mantra as I’ve been dealing w/ all of the things going on in my life. Something’s gotta give, though – it really does.

Ms. Brannan’s sister was diagnosed w/ colon cancer, which has unfortunately already spread. Sigh. I hope this doesn’t become one of those delayed reaction type deals for me. The day my Aunt Natalie died, I cried my little eyes out. Shel took me to the movies to try to get my mind off of things and honestly, since that point, I haven’t shed a single tear. I wonder if I’m avoiding it. When I found out about Ms. Brannan’s sister, it made my hands start to tremble like, “Oh, here we go again” because everything that happened is still so fresh in my head. I wonder if I’m also still in a bit of denial about my grandma although it happened nearly five years ago. I loved my gradnma tremendously and when she died, I was a wreck at her funeral – couldn’t bear it – then I didn’t shed a single tear again for almost two years. Except when I was watching a movie where an animal died … that always, w/o a doubt, makes me cry.


I really need a shower. I ought to go get one.

So, Pope Watch 2005 has ended w/ a new German Pope. I have a wee bit of German blood in me somewhere, so that’s pretty cool. Apparently Pope Benedict is very conservative, which, although disappointing, isn’t a big surprise. I’m not expecting a Pope to support homosexuality or abortion or anything, but it would have been nice to have one who didn’t view birth control as a sin. But, who knows. Maybe he’ll be a little bit more progressive than John Paul was. Only time will tell. He looks like a pope, though.

I need to get my butt in gear and get out into the sunshine.